How to ask better questions

The most successful leaders I have known are absolute super stars at one particular skill – asking questions. But not just any questions! It’s the calibre of the questions they ask that makes all the difference.

Questions can open the door to improved decision-making, more strategic thinking and creativity. Good quality questions can also help your people to feel seen, heard and understood.

Here’s how you can up-level your leadership with a few well-timed, thoughtful questions.

1. Know why you’re asking

Are you seeking new information, encouraging discussion or challenging assumptions? Understanding the purpose behind your questions can help you frame them more purposefully.

2. Practice active listening

You’ve heard me talk about this before. Great questions stem from active listening. School yourself to truly focus on what is being said, rather than on framing your response as they are speaking. It may lead to a few awkward silences as you digest what you have heard and then frame your response, but trust me – the silence gets easier!

3. Be curious

I feel lucky that I am naturally curious and interested in other people, so I’m always asking a bajillion questions! If you find it harder to connect so readily on a personal level, understand what does interest you. Perhaps you are curious about how things work, or about systems or processes. Tap into your natural curiosity to ask the kinds of questions that may just end up inspiring your team to not only share their thoughts, but to start thinking differently.

4. Ask bigger questions

This is not to suggest that you shouldn’t ask pointed questions like “How can we improve our response times?” or “What will this cost?” But when we ask questions that invite people to think beyond Business As Usual, we are opening ourselves and our teams up to potentially game-changing opportunities.

Here are a few examples:

• Why do we do it this way?
• What are we missing?
• How can we make this even better?
• What would it take to achieve X?
• What is the end goal?
• What did we learn from that experience that we can take forward?
• What would make this easier?
• What resources could we tap into?
• Where do we anticipate resistance and what will we do about that?

5. Ask positive questions

I learned this little gem from a coach who checked me for asking closed-minded questions. Instead of asking questions like “Why am I so hopeless?” (which are essentially rhetorical in nature) I learned to ask “What do I need right now to take me to the next step?”

Another example: Instead of “Why can’t I do this?” ask “How can I do this?”

Positively-framed questions can help you get unstuck and point you in the direction of progress.

As a bonus, this is an incredibly powerful practice for any person who has struggled with negative self-talk.